How to Have a Meaningful Wedding Ceremony During the Pandemic: A conversation with Priya Parker and Elaine Welteroth
Priya Parker on weddings in quarantine
My life’s work is to gather people in meaningful ways. Now that we all find ourselves in the midst of a global pandemic, ‘gathering-in-meaningful-ways’ looks a whole lot different than it did in our pre-corona world. The past couple of months, I’ve been doing a lot of research and brainstorming on how to achieve authentic, heartfelt connection in ceremonies, even when we can’t gather physically.
Priya Parker has been one of my go-to sources for inspiration. Priya is the author of the must-read book The Art of Gathering and host of The New York Times’ new Together Apart podcast, which explores how to gather meaningfully while apart.
One of this month’s Together Apart episodes considers weddings in the time of coronavirus and features the creative solutions of two couples who went ahead with their weddings despite having to drastically change their plans due to the pandemic.
Priya shows my article some love in New York Times Events livestream!
When Priya Parker’s newsletter announcing the episode landed in my inbox, I thought of all the couples I’m working with right now — and all the other couples across the world — who are wrestling with the decision of what to do about their weddings. I had recently written an article for couples who’ve elected to postpone, offering them simple ritual ideas to mark their original wedding date so they can begin to gently (and joyfully) shift their energy toward their new wedding date. I thought this might be something that would interest Priya, so I sent it to her.
I was delighted to receive a response with a last-minute invitation to join Priya and best-selling author, journalist and editor, Elaine Welteroth, on a New York Times Events Live at Home session on the topic. (Sadly, I was away from my email for a couple of hours and missed the chance to join them on the livestream - dang it!)
In their exchange, Priya describes my article as a beautiful resource for couples who would like to mark their original wedding date with intention when they’ve had to postpone. You can access the interview by clicking on the poster below. Listen for their discussion of my article starting around 14:30. If you or someone you know are looking for ways to make lemonade out of lemons in these times, I highly recommend you listen to their conversation. I guarantee you will be inspired!
Achieving the perfect ceremony despite the pandemic
Elaine Welteroth and her fiancé Jonathan were one of the couples featured in the Together Apart podcast episode on weddings in quarantine. When the pandemic hit, they had a decision to make: Should they postpone? Or should they go ahead and tie the knot on their original date - even if it meant drastically changing their plans? Since there was a lot of symbolism tied up in their chosen wedding date, they ultimately decided—come hell or high water—they were going to get married on 5.10.20!
They completely reimagined their ceremony and the end result was something magical — physical distancing and all! One of the most beautiful elements that they created was a ‘love letter’ exercise and virtual family photo. Ahead of the ceremony, they asked their guests to write them a love letter with best wishes and advice for their marriage. Guests were also asked to write one word on the back of the envelope - a word for Elaine and Jonathan to take with them on their marriage journey. At a specified point during the Zoom ceremony, guests all held up their word to their screens at the same time. This made for a moving and one-of-a-kind virtual family photo. This is a great example of how to create meaningful connection in a virtual space!
Following the ceremony, all the letters were mailed out to the couple. Instead of a guestbook, they will forever treasure a stack of handwritten letters from their nearest and dearest. Honestly, there are so many gems that this couple divined for their ceremony. Listen to the interview and check out this Vogue article on Elaine and Jonathan’s stoop wedding to learn more!
Harnessing creativity and the power of technology
There are all kinds of ways that gatherings can connect and inspire in spite of the global pandemic forcing us to stay physically apart. With a whole lot of creativity (and often the help of some technology), important life transitions can still be marked in community in a meaningful way. These are the kinds of creative challenges that energize me and get my creative juices flowing!
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Credit: Emma Love Photography
AUTHOR: KARLA COMBRES
As a Legacy Guide & Celebrant, I help individuals, couples, families and organizations make the big and small moments in life count, and shape their legacy along the way. I offer:
Drawing on my vast experience as a Life-Cycle Celebrant and in working with people at the end of life, I am uniquely qualified to help people move through transitions meaningfully and to think about how they want to leave this world so they can live better now.
I’m based in Saskatchewan, Canada and serve clients worldwide. Read more about me here.
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